Sesame Street: Grieving with Children

 

 

Many might be familiar with Sesame Street, which has long been lauded for its creative and effective approach to educating children on multiple levels, from life lessons to academic essentials. In 2010, as part of their Talk, Listen, Connect series, Sesame Street released an outreach video regarding the topic of approaching children when faced with a recent passing in the family, hoping to bring families even closer even with grief. The goal is to encourage parents and children alike to communicate more deeply and openly during times of grief and bereavement, understanding that though difficult, these moments offer a unique opportunity for genuine connection and mutual support.

 

 

 

The story begins with Elmo and his father preparing for a family picnic in the park when they discover a baseball cap belonging to Elmo’s late Uncle Jack. Enamoured by the item, Elmo fondly reminisces all of their time together, as though nothing had changed since. Elmo held onto the hope that he could meet his uncle again, but his father reluctantly explains that Uncle Jack has passed on. Though Elmo had digested this information in the past, it seemed to completely elude his understanding, stating that he could see Uncle Jack another time. His father compassionately explained to Elmo how Uncle Jack’s body no longer worked and could not do things Elmo had previously associated with him. He warmly invites Elmo to ask any questions about it at any point in time.

 

 

 

While the kids play, Aunt Jill worriedly explains to the parents that she has been trying to encourage Jesse to discuss her feelings regarding the situation, but she hasn’t spoken. With empathy, Elmo’s father offers speaking to Jesse to put pressure off both of them. Jesse soon found herself being transported to a fond memory of her father, after seeing Elmo and his father interact. Though visibly distressed, Jesse could not find herself expressing her raw emotions vocally, even with Rosita picking it up. 

Elmo’s father notices and has a heart-to-heart talk with her, relating to Jesse’s feelings of sadness and anger. Jesse lights up upon feeling understood, and states strongly how unfair it feels.

 

“Sometimes it’s hard to talk about someone who died because it brings up big feelings.. We may never be done being sad about this, but the thing about sadness is, it comes and goes.”

 

 

Elmo’s father warmly encourages Jesse to share her feelings with someone, be it her family or her friends as they all care about her, and that she would feel better in comparison to bottling them up. He also shares that remembering good times they’ve had with Uncle Jack, and how much of a good person he was, will help pull the family through. The both of them share a sweet, much-needed embrace. Afterwards, Jesse shows the family her box filled with mementos related to Uncle Jack, and the family finds consolation together through their other memories of him.

 

“When someone is gone, you’re going to find that you need to give your heart a little time.”

 

Alongside the story, ‘When Families Grieve’ involves segments with families sharing stories of how they have felt, what was learned, and how they are coping with the loss of their loved one. A mother shares that although she’s always been honest with her youngest son in sharing his passing, it would be done in small doses in consideration of how her son would be overwhelmed. In another family, Another family has created a tradition to celebrate their lost loved one’s life by visiting his grave and releasing handwritten letters tied to balloons encouraging them to process the situation in a healthy and connected way – mourning for the loss and celebrating his life. These stories serve as examples that no grief process is the same, but it is important to find ways to connect.

 

 

It is never an easy situation to experience especially with children, along with the stages of grief we all go through with loss. But with mutual love, support and understanding, families become closer to one another, and that in itself deeply strengthens ties. Being open to answering any questions your child has will not only provide them with comfort but assurance that you will be there for them. If you find yourself in a similar position as Aunt Jill, opening up to your child’s questions as well as playing an active role in creating lines of communication between other family members can create an environment that stresses understanding and support. Such unified effort encourages children to be more open in expressing their feelings and paving the way towards closure. 

 

Understand that children have their personal limits too and can be easily overwhelmed, so taking it slow and letting them speak at their own pace helps with their process. This slow and steady approach helps children naturally become more experienced in managing similar situations in the future, while also allowing them to develop a strong connection with the family around them. Through dialogue, parents have the opportunity to discern what kind of support their child might need and can provide such support in a way that enables their child to trust them. By expressing reassurance that everyone in the household is there for each other, children can feel a deeper connection and can receive emotional support during times of loss or grief.